Let Me Tell You About A Porcupines Balls

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

I'm NOT Supposed To Do That?

Allow me be perfectly blunt here: if I had known, if even for a second, that Flying to another country (to Philadelphia specifically), and meeting a strange man, whom I'd presumably communicated with via the inter-tubes, in a Hampton Inn budget hotel, with the end-goal of having this man most-economically fill my ass pouches with silicone gel...was dangerous...

If I had known in any way, shape or form that having an unlicensed man inject industrial goo into my seating surfaces, while enjoying a combination of taquitos he had room service bring us and Dora the Explorer on the "tele"...posed a risk to my health...

If I had thought one in my head that this foreign stranger and proprietor of the fine website www.CheapButtCheekImplantsNow.net/totally-safe/no-hotel-rape/wont-kill-me/ was in any way not a legitimate medical professional, who chose to operate not out of a medical facility, but out of a Hampton Inn simply because it's more comfortable and includes a free continental breakfast...might end up killing me...

Well...there was just no way I could have predicted this horrible outcome.

He assured me that he had watched ALL seasons of Nip / Tuck

No comments:

Post a Comment